Can Of Worms

Opening a can of worms is either good or bad. I am not sure where that saying came from, but unless you have actually physically opened a can of worms, you may not know what it really means. Not even sure which kind of can of worms. Real live worms? or the fake surprise jump out at you kind? Either way, they are unpredictable when you open the lid and look inside. I guess I am not sure what to think about the whole thing. On one hand, if you are honest and open with people anyways, you shouldn't have any cans to open. But, on the other hand if there were never any cans to open, life might not be as interesting. I wish wholeheartedly that I didn't have to bear this burden of my can of worms. I wish for such bad thing to happen so that I can avoid the situation of the burden. I must hold my can unopened for the time being, but I fear that those involved can see the glimmer of the can and are burdened by the curiosity of what is inside. I am not skilled in hiding most things all the time. I cannot be vulnerable and hedged at the same time. It takes so much mental capacity to maintain it all together. I have a Hand to rest in, and a God given husband to physically hedge for me. But even that feels not enough at times. I have such a loving husband who know my burden almost to its fullest, and he isn't afraid to show his protecting hand. That is where I can rest and know I am safe. So in time the can that I carry will either be avoided my the situations of life, or it will be opened with all the glory that is jumping, wiggling, writhing, slithering nastiness.

Travel

I always seem to think I have things under control before we leave for travel. Until the day before, then I start freaking out, because I just know I am gonna forget something. But it does not matter if we forget something. Just remember that grandparents will buy anything that we need!! And if the house isn't in perfect condition when we leave, its not a big deal. Think calm thoughts. Think calm thoughts. breathe in, hold, breathe out. *sigh* Traveling also gets my tummy into knots. The stress of it all doesn't always equal the reward. But we do this for the family that cannot afford to come see us. But what if we couldn't afford to come to see them? We might be in that predicament soon. I think the grandparents will still whine and beg for us to come see them. But plane tickets are expensive, and kids are just not that fun to travel with. OY. At least the laundry is done.

Wat?

I am needing to learn a new culture, but not a full immersion culture. I just need enough information to tell my children later in life about their culture. I am hoping to incorporate a few side dishes into my regular cooking routine. Not that I have a routine about cooking, but just a loose rotation, with some experiments. I enjoy cooking so much that my loving husband has gotten me cooking classes for our anniversary. Cool huh? So I am gonna try to make Atakilt Wat, a cabbage-potato-carrot stew. It is traditionally served over injera, but unfortunately I am not gonna attempt that at this time. I am gonna mix up some butter with some spices to make the nitr qibe, instead of ghee.

So the ingredients needed are:

• 3 tbsp olive
• 1 medium onion, halved and thinly sliced
• 1 small head of cabbage, sliced 4 medium carrots, sliced thick on the bias
  
• 4 medium potatoes, scrubbed and chopped
• 5 cloves garlic, minced ( I will use a press)
• 1 (1-inch) piece fresh ginger root, finely minced
• ½ tsp. curry powder
• ½ tbsp. ground turmeric
  
• 1 pinch ground cardamom
• ¼ tsp. paprika
• ½ c. water
• 1 tbsp of the spice mixed butter
  

And the instructions:

Heat the oil in a large pot over medium-high heat. Add all the veggies. Cook until softened, stirring often. Add the garlic and ginger, and cook for 1 minute. Stir in the spices and water, cover and bring to a boil. Remove the cover and stir well, then lower the heat, cover and simmer until the vegetables are tender and the liquid has reduced completely, about 25 minutes.

And like I said earlier, it should be served warm over injera, but I am gonna attempt to make it a side dish to some chicken or beef.

Alignment

How can all the right things be wrapped up in one person? How can an opening in a schedule happen that same day? And then just amazingness just abounds. God's sovereignty was revealed in so much of my weakness. I worry about so many things, and then I get overwhelmed and I forget how to keep the peace. I lose my self-control. Control of my thoughts, and fears, and memories. When this happens it spills over into so much more of my life. It is really a complete loss of control of everything. But through my crazy out of control life, God remains in control. I really didn't have control in the first place, but I thought I did. God's timing is perfect for everything. I have a peace about so many more things at this junction of my life, than in any other past attempts at all this. Which makes me hopeful that the light at the end of the tunnel will actually shine upon me soon. All my selfishness is just not fair to my family, especially my husband. He is so patient, and loving. And I am just so hateful, mean, and ugly to him in so many ways. Loving thoughts are in demand at this point. But I just received my favorite book back from a friend, and I am forcing myself to read and remember the principles of Titus 2. God has placed all the tools in front of me at the same time. What an Amazing God we have?

Time

When enough time passes we can say it is enough. But how much is enough? When do you know when to say those words? Time is such a valuable commodity, I am not sure any of us really understands its vitality. Time heals, time is fast, time is slow, time is a father, time is an enemy or a friend. What else can time do?

But does time really heal? Or is it that so many things have happens since then that we forget the first item of business? Does our mind fill our files with so much other stuff that we "forget" what the problem was in the first place, and we commend time for doing the task our mind actually accomplished? Time to me is a roller coaster of life. It has its ups and it has its downs, and it really goes round and round. No really it does. If you look at a clock long enough you might get dizzy. But could you actually get dizzy from a slow moving object such as Big Ben?

Well, back to the point. Time as a healer. The healing qualities of time are not so healing as they are masking, or diminishing the pain. When my Brother died, it was a great sharp piercing pain in those first few hours of that December morning. But over the next few days, time raced on and on with things to do and take care of. And during that racing time, the pain was numbed. Time did not heal that pain, it was a pain killer for the moment. Then as time slowed down, the pain got stronger and came back with a vengeance, or maybe like that hangover headache. And now as almost 11 years have passed, the pain is linked to songs, smells, places and memories. The pain is still here. Time has not healed the pain, so I repeat, does time really Heal? In my experience No. Time is such a friend, and time is such an alcoholic drink to numb the pains of life. Has enough time passed to say anything?

a Journey Indeed

Adoption is an incredible journey.

We witness a Miracle every time a child enters into life. But those who make their journey home across time & miles, growing within the hearts of those who wait to love them, are carried on the wings of destiny and placed among us by
God's very own hands.
~Kristi Larson